Writing with Juliet Iwelunmor

Since it’s good to be afraid, but not to paralyzed by your fear, I say fear even while you dream, fear when you begin any journey, fear even if the journey takes you through sloppy paths or shabby hills, fear when things seem under control, fear when things seem out of control, still fear through tough times that descend like rain in the middle of a hot summer day, fear when the same day turns wild and ends with glistening rainbow, fear whether there are wild roses or bushy thorns, fear whether your heart leaps or your mouth sings, fear when you face the things you fear the most, fear when life rises up with a spit of energy, fear with it turns dark and nurses you tenderly, fear whether yesterday creeps around like old dead roses, still fear if tomorrow is as stubborn as plucked red roses, fear even if the mention of fear forces you to shiver, fear if the thoughts are as enormous as rivers, fear when you remember these words, fear as you walk still knowing nothing is final. 

In one week, in the middle of the start of something different, I have seen 2 different rainbows. Both appeared when I saw fear face to face. I have been in a state of emptiness all year, doing things that I fear and wondering if fear will ever dissipate. It turns out it doesn’t. Just as soon as you face fear and overcome what you feared, another set of fear creeps in and overtakes the other thing you feared. This is my present state of affairs as I delve deeper into this state of emptiness. Life it turns out will teach you how to lean into fear whether harshly or tenderly. The goal is to lean, see fear face to face, even as you see rainbows with the thing you feared the most, like the dreams you dream again. Both are necessary, fear and your dreams. Keep them.