Writing with Juliet Iwelunmor

I have been thinking about what parents can do while they wait. A family member runs an Applied Behavioral therapy group and she is having a hard time finding therapists for her many kiddos. I said it must be tough and is the waiting list much better now. My reasons and full disclosure, one of my sons used ABA therapy as part of his early intervention in the beginning years of our journey into autism. I credit it for helping us navigate a lot of behavioral issues in the beginning. Is it perfect, not really? But it can help you make sense of how to help your child behave. Since the pandemic, the waiting lists for families like us that dropped out to protect ourselves has been through the roof. There are no great places and everyone keeps placing you on waiting lists. My family members list is at least 300 names strong. I nearly choked. What are parents doing while they wait, I asked? She said nothing. I was sad. You mean when children need early intervention, they still can’t get it and all they can do is wait? She said the yes.

It got me thinking about this post I am writing now. I don’t have an answer but if you are a parent in waiting, here are three main things we did:

1) We found a pediatrician who practices integrative medicine. She was a lifesaver. She helped us make sense of autism in ways that I will always be grateful for. Find one and begin to start a journey into integrative medicine for your child.

2) Check vitamin D levels. Our sons levels were so low. Like terribly low. His integrative pediatrician ordered blood work and that’s how we found out and started to supplement with vitamin D. I still do so till today and I have read research and been told that it plays a role with children on the spectrum.

3) The third thing we did was do a lot of video recordings. It seems counterintuitive, what would they even do. Honestly, at that time we didn’t have speech and I didn’t know what I was doing except that I recorded myself a lot reading books over and over and over gain to my son. They weren’t perfect, just us reading together. When I leave the room or he happens to get a hold of my phone, I would see him watching the videos over and over again to the point where he even memorized them. So that when speech finally arrived, it was the stories that I instinctively remember him speaking first.

Every child is different and will respond differently to these suggestions. But I hope they help you on your journey as you wait.

A bonus one we did was to use a prescription medicine known for speech properties with our son. I won’t share the name here and it is very subjective with each pediatrician you make ask about it. But I believe it helped us gain speech. My son was three and barely said a single word. He pointed at everything he wanted and those days were very frustrating. Our integrative pediatrician prescribed the medicine for us and we used it alongside some high dose omega three over the counter meds and all I can say is that we have speech and it is as audible and loud as can be. It’s the reason we have hope through our journey. My son still has miles to go but we are content with each step he takes.

Finally, I am a proud mother of a child on the spectrum. The shame and ridicule i have seen with autism especially within some African communities is a disgrace. That some people would deny admitting that their children may need help is also a shame. I have been cussed and ridiculed for suggesting it to some parents, including within my own family. Listen, if I see something, I will say something. If you do nothing or even call me the devil, I will take it so long as your conscience pricks you to do something. Early intervention works and it’s not for you. It’s for the child that deserves a future that you alone no matter whether you are a doctor or farmer can’t provide. Get over yourself and the label of being on a spectrum and help your child. That’s all. You can still call me a devil afterwards. I still don’t care.